Franchises are for Food Courts

CAPI x Phamily Kitchen

We’re starting today with Michael Pham of Phamily Kitchen – proud owner of hands-down the funniest menu in the city. The ex-owner of Tiny,  Michael’s turned 374 Smith Street from a creepy bain marie cafe into a seriously cool little place that’s smashing out some awesome food,

Where are we?
Phamily Kitchen, 374 Smith St


I see what you did with the name there, was that intentional?
It was a joke.

Like this whole place is kind of a joke?
Yeah, just don’t tell anybody.


What’s the deal with the condom machine in your toilet?
It’s meant to be called ‘The Phamily Planning Unit’ but we never got around to getting the sign made.

On average how many tinder dates would Phamily Kitchen entertain?
Ha are you kidding? 69.


Biggest selling item?
Chicken curry – Vietnamese people do curry, get that on your plate.

Got any white people in the kitchen?
Yeah, there’s a white girl in the kitchen who’s amazing at rice paper rolls. She has a really good palate, first day on her trial we got her to roll and she killed it.

Do you ever watch the traffic, have you got a favourite crazy person?
The funny guy who hangs out with his hot twins all day, I’m like what do you do at work? And are they both dating you? It’s just weird.


Is this a thing?
I’ve seen them! They look quite athletic, he’s just this one guy who hangs out with them all the time. 


That’s fantastic. Are you hard on driving Insta, being active on there? 
You don’t want to piss people off by posting photos all the time that’s how people unfollow too, also most people sound really fucking lame when they promote their business. It’s the tone it’s like, ‘Hi, did you think that this could contain this and this’ and I’m like NOOOO I don’t want a fucking quiz, I just want to see your photo and keep scrolling through. 


What’s the most important asset in the building?
Gas, get on it.

It’s cool to see a shop this small where somebody cares this much, and pays that much attention to detail. It really stands out and I think that’s really obvious.
Well it was put together properly.

Who did the fit out?
A cranky cyclist architect friend, he’s a nice guy.

What happened to your cool Fiat 500?
Sold it, it just wasn’t that practical, it was perfect branding though.

Phamily Kitchen
Where it
at? 374 Smith Street, Collingwood
Want to book? 9417 2888
Tag your food @phamilykitchen

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